That’s right, boys and girls, it’s time for a good old-fashioned NERD RANT. Because the world of Harry Potter is SRS BSNS.
So, I’m a Ravenclaw. Y’know, that whole “wit beyond measure” thing? The House of Luna Lovegood? Yep, that’s me. From what Google tells me, anyway.
When I first read the Harry Potter books I never really knew which Hogwarts House I would be (hypothetically) sorted into, so of course I figured I’d get some answers by searching for “sorting hat quiz”. (As of right now, there are about 4,540,000 results for this search phrase.)
So, I began. I took quiz after quiz, and answered questions as mundane as “What’s your favorite color?” and deeper questions like (on a scale of 1-9) “I often feel guilty; I am quick to blame myself, even though I might not talk about it.”
Somewhere around fifteen pages into the search results, and I’d yet to be sorted anywhere but good ol’ Ravenclaw. Which is pretty rad, right? Not only does this mean I’m a freaking genius, but I’m in the same House as the radish earring-wearing goddess known as Luna Lovegood. And thanks to Luke Conard, I’m free to chant “I’m a Ravenclaw/I like to read books/when I cast spells/they’re off the freaking hook.” Total win, right?
I mean, of course it had to be this way. Of course I would be sorted into the House with an apparent identity crisis.
See, in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, Ravenclaw’s colors are described as being blue and bronze, with an eagle mascot. Enter the Sorcerer’s Stone movie, and what do we get?
Blue and silver. With a raven mascot. WHAT. THE. HELL.
As far as I know, there has never been any explanation given for why this change was made. If you happen to have any intelligence on this, I would love to hear about it because I’m absolutely dying of curiosity. But this leads me to a bigger problem: as a book purist, I’m stuck having to buy Ravenclaw merchandise in the wrong colors with the wrong mascot, because Warner Bros. has something against eagles or something. *headdesk*
And of course it seems silly to many of you, my rage towards this injustice. But come on! It’s in the freaking books! As per J.K. Rowling, aka GOD in the Harry Potter fandom. How can you eff that up? Unless the writers and/or producers didn’t actually read the books close enough to catch that detail, of course. (Sometimes I wonder…)
Okay, I can kind of see it. “Ravenclaw”. Yeah, I get it, you took it literally. But then again, the mascot for Hufflepuff isn’t a Huffle…or a Puff…so I still can’t really let Warner Bros. have that one. And I know many of my fellow Ravenclaws feel that blue and silver look better together than blue and bronze, but…but, I…I just…IT’S IN THE BOOKS! THAT’S HOW IT’S SUPPOSED TO BE! AKFJHDGHFJLDSHFFHF!!!!!!!!!
I really should just get over myself and buy this freaking thing if I want a Ravenclaw shirt so badly. But I just…ugh. I hate it. I want a blue and bronze shirt with an eagle, and that’s how it should be. I don’t want a stupid, ugly raven with a stupid blue and silver color scheme because it’s ugly and dumb and not how it is in the books.
So THERE. /childishtantrum